I’m reading PAST LIVES by Celine Song — and this is the line of my life right now. Something about heartbreak is not just about losing something, I have to figure out the wording, but about sharing what you’ve gained too. This is Once Upon a Time on Miracle Mile, though more about heartbreak, so yes, the scenes have to sort of around that, in a sense, since few things are happening at once right now. I was too young to feel heartbreak, I didn’t know what this was. You couldn’t hurt me. Sure, I suppose I had my moments, but not really. You couldn’t REALLY hurt me. Now, I know you can. I’m over here. Not making the same choices…with Death, lol, the oldest storyteller, I have storytelling GOALS. Places I want to get to.
Anyway, I’m sort of sitting today about to get to my bible, visually, not knowing what to watch. I watched the nostalgic movie of all nostalgic movies (Terms of Endearment, these movies aside) St. Elmo’s Fire. I watched that last night with that “do do do” theme song. This hilarious group of friends struggling with 22. And Barbara Harris says, “I could do a great 22,” not 34. In any case, I’m sitting on some sort of Heavenly Creatures and some heartfelt family portrait that’s funny because it’s the early 90s and everyone is in sports gear…with Angelita sometimes in American Apparel, basically, in jeans, a body suit, and kitten heels…her hair like feathers: the stork that snatched a baby back—quick with a face that knows it. “OH MY GOD.” We’re getting through this baby.
So I gotta push that button.
Heartbreak being somewhat the theme here around the lambada…so maybe the other songs, well, some of them work, I only have a couple, for the moment, but at least, thanks to Peter Jackson, I see movement sequences, fantasy sequences, this mother can dream of what she wants to do to him…and trust me, it was pretty dark. It was. And no one…is going to care that much…because everyone can understand, truly. So—she’s chill. But I can’t, in some senses, tell a story that’s about a bunch of things at once? But I’ll keep working my way through it.
The chandelier works. Even if you think about tears. Wet eyes. That’s the idea. Sparkle. With some of the Peter Jackson playfulness, humor, but different styles can co-exist. So I’ll take a turn around that “real fight” that she has with her mother (Heavenly Creatures) and turn it into the real…as if wakingg up from a dream…I don’t know quite how to put that, but it works. I can see that.
It’s like all those nostalgic movies for high school…sort of funny, too, since you have to fall in love with this family, it’s crucial, and you want to go these parties… you want to see this family as a kind of miracle. It’s just, wow, even when I think about Mary…she had to flee because Herod was killing babies, seriously, right? So that’s pretty intense. Intense beginnings there. Bloody. So we swerve and try our best, and this mother even hilariously got very very very upset. It got a little twisted, confusing, what the fuck, and we got through it. They are keeping Maria, and then, hear “7th heaven, do do do do….” the TV show.
So maybe I can juxtapose the feeling of family like a nostalgic thing, that makes you go, oh yeah, I remember that extraordinary idea…like wow, this is quite a story, and this is quite the situation. And based on my entire LIFE, people couldn’t relate to me, but then, I’ll do another movie more related to my experience, but I feel like “imagine this happened to your family…” is a bit easier to click into…like whoa. And these kids can fight — like call the cops, who gives a shit? Michele. Louise like, uh, and Jose um her guardian now? You know? You make connections, man, this baby has been here for four years — a real little kid now. A totally different human being… it goes without saying…and I thought that some family scene at the end…
St. Elmo’s Fire, look, he sleeps with everyone, and then, his best friend sleeps with his fiancee, and Rob Lowe has to save Demi Moore from drug use and depression…and in the end, they’re all friends, still, no? Walking with conviction — with heartfelt sentiments of the “journey we took together…” into the house… closing the door. “Do do…do do do do do do…” with the sexy sax being Angelita. Lol.
That’s basically it. So I’ll try to make a fun bible…
For the memories…
I don’t know if the average person behind a desk is going to understand Barbara Harris. Like, she was the heartfelt person, I don’t know quite how to put that, but she seemed to touch your heart, a bit, which is what made her funny? “Love is the key that opens every door,” Nichols cracking up. “Hilarious.” It’s the first thing she said. Because she couldn’t speak…and why? Confidence comes from belonging, all very touching. She was touching. I just don’t know what to point to exactly. So I’m going to leave the movie watching aside a moment to put together this “photo album” family scrap book of a family portrait. With some totally random girl…suddenly…
Anyway, got my clown piece in. And I was able to move my new job until next week. All good.