But I also had some drinks last night, danced around, celebrated. So I’m in a zen space though my mind is really active today. It’s why I don’t typically drink. I hear that most people experience a DIP in energy when for me, it’s the opposite. I don’t know what to say because there are natural raises in energy states, so you eat and chill. Basic formula. All the same, I took a break from studying some geological phenomenon that researchers just linked to some evolutionary phenomenon…always going…is that odd? Really? Isn’t that obvious? I guess not. Just because tectonic plates shifting feels like a rather massive event, like super continents breaking off to float somewhere, I don’t know. That makes sense to me. I just read that these geologists found the same rock in two different locations, so they can confirm that the rise of mountains 500 million years ago made these reefs, the world’s first, drown on top of being CRUSHED by all this rock falling off this rising mountain…and a bunch of life forms were crushed out of existence— boom. Ouch, that’s what I thought. And I was so sad, looking at these sponges because they look like cartoons. I suppose they all do, but these looked super cool. I’d take a dive for them. Some of these sea creatures were completely futuristic, just amazing.
So now I have to cover something else. I don’t want to do this work, to be real, but I find the topics super interesting, like sure, I can become a party trick where I can let you know what happened 500 million years ago, sure sure, and tell you about inventions… so it’s fine for the moment…but of course, now, after going through a transformational two months — emerged a filmmaker — in Portici… I just want to sell this idea. I mean, maybe three drafts, even if I have to clean up my images, I don’t know, isn’t that many drafts… I just think the elements combined in the story make it a good sell. I can do that well. My mother alone is so unnatural a person, which I just don’t understand as a fundamental idea of hers, that it opens the door to razor sharp language and surreal tactics, I don’t know what that means. Meaning, she can call, hang up, call back, throw out lines that reach some exclamation — ah! That’s just who she is. Except, I don’t know about “that convo,” the one, and she has to be present for it, even if it happened on the phone? Where she accuses her husband… of being a child molester. She cried real tears! This Brazilian mother told me at the tennis club, since we discussed this so many times, and I wouldn’t be surprised if people heard. There were reasons why - more so for myself - I did that. I just couldn’t believe it. She cried real tears. But that’s not news. Right. I’m just studying this. You see, I studied this as in depth as I could, so she was always a strange person, dramatic, hard to grasp, and then, she gives this monologue… except…for you…meaning the audience… you’re going to keep on sitting back… like oooooh…what a strange phone call from the father, eek. Okay, now I’m here. And we’re partying now… how fun… and then, he starts asking to come over and stand in this open door… watching some obviously fake performance…whoa. But yeah, we’re not telling him what we know, shush, we’re going to rip this guy to shreds in the end, okay. So around the time that DR. J comes wheeling in to ignore me to the point of spectacle, same thing, she’s thinking — I think — maybe this is because it’s true and it’s screwing her up to the point of total destruction. Melt down.
I think that’s going to be your assumption. But then, by that point, somewhere, you have to be so confused by her as a person, since that’s what it was, where you have absolutely no sense of what the truth is… where stories are so bizarre, that by the end, her head totally spinning, it has to not be true. That was her thought process. But she can’t physically go there, you see, she can’t physically handle how gross it was… how gross she was… and look, as a child, it was less like I wanted to hurt myself by inquiring into what happened, but why are these her ideas to begin with? Where the hell did this come from? You see? Since it was so severe. But then, my father seemed so strangely normal that…the two of them together really puzzled me for so many years, like I just couldn’t put my finger on it.
I’m supposed to not talk about this movie from the standpoint of hope, I’m trying to approach it like “I know.” I understand all sorts of things happen, but I’m just believing 100% — seeing what that does. I know that will lead me to the next step. I just had a touch too much fun… where it’s hard to turn back… but I am where I am…and I have to work on the other things I got going. But I’m super excited, I’m beyond excited that someone is going to try and sell my movie idea. I don’t have to do that, I just sit here and try to connect to that person who’s going to crack up at Celine Dion, like wow, I see. Holy shit, that’s just an instant classic. Cracking up with me… because I had a funny eye. Celine Dion — these four crazy years that I lived at a total stranger’s house were scored by love songs. And not just any. The Power of Love. Lambada. Through the Years… and this family is protecting me from my family.
I’m telling you, part of the problem with me — I was that cute. My outrage, my fits, whatever, across the house, with this mother leaping into the air with the girls as JOSE is just trying to cut me off since I attack, I seriously attack, and he cannot attack a four year old. I could suddenly yell things that would crack people up. I’m moving to NY!!! across the house. And no one knows WHY I know this. Pushing screen doors open. I was a quick critter. Just my face of determination at four… like where am I going to go? At this age? Totally stupid. JOSE can say it, “this is STUPID!” NAH UH! Running…little legs… I don’t think I fell either, you know? So just put this baby on a goddamn court. I liked that, like in this version, she turns out to have potential to become a great tennis player. Where she can flip out if she wants to. Just put it — over there. Good, you can chuck the racket if you want to, momentarily. Some tennis instructor showing me some videos — see? Totally works. People love it. Okay, I say. RARRRRR. I’m going GET YOU. I just thought it was great.
Anyway, I gotta go back to covering science news.